How to Cope With a Sibling Moving to College

A sibling moving to college is an exciting and challenging time – and it can be a huge emotional rollercoaster for you, your sibling, and your family.

Your brother or sister will be excited to start a new chapter in their life, but will most likely be rather scared to step out of their comfort zone and face the world on their own.

Your parents will be proud of their child but will be worried about them and sad to see them leave the family nest.

You will probably be happy for your brother or sister, but, at the same time, you may feel sad to part with them, anxious about their absence, or even jealous of your sibling’s new life.

They’re about to embark on a new adventure, but you’re left behind – and that’s not easy to deal with.

So, what should you do? How to cope with a sibling moving to college? How to get over it?

Here are some expert tips and coping strategies to help you deal with your sibling moving to college and keep your relationship strong.

How to deal with a sibling before going to college

As overwhelmed as you may feel when you find out that your sibling is going to college, you need to be understanding and supportive during this difficult period.

Talk to your sibling

The first thing to do is to have a heart-to-heart conversation with your sibling.

Let them know how you feel and ask them how they feel about the situation. You may find that they are also anxious, scared, or overwhelmed.

Try to reassure them, show them how much you care about them, and promise to be there for them when they need you – your sibling will likely reciprocate and it will make you feel much better.

Talking to your brother or sister will not only help you understand your feelings but will also help strengthen your bond.

Acknowledge your feelings

As your sibling gets ready to move to college, you’re certain to feel a mix of emotions – anxiety, excitement, sadness, jealousy, etc. It’s important to acknowledge and process these emotions so you can successfully deal with them.

First, remember that this is a big transition and it’s okay to feel a range of emotions. Then, examine your feelings and identify their specific sources:

• Are you anxious that you won’t have your sibling’s support (as they won’t be home and won’t be able to help you in difficult situations)? Or are you anxious that something bad may happen to your brother or sister when they’re away from home?
• Are you jealous of the freedom your sibling is going to have after moving away from home? Or are you simply afraid that they will be so engrossed in their new life that they will forget you? etc.

Talk to someone you trust (your parents, your close friends, etc.) about your anxieties, fears, and worries, and let their rational reassurances give you comfort and confidence.

Allow yourself to feel your emotions, but try to repel the negative ones and focus on the positive. (After your sibling moves away to college, you’ll have your shared room all for yourself, you know.)

Help your sibling prepare for going to college

When moving to college, your sibling will probably be overwhelmed not only with emotions but with moving preparations as well. They will greatly appreciate any help you can offer:

• Help your sibling organize and pack their belongings Help your brother or sister sort out their items and decide what to pack for college, see if you can find some free packing boxes for them, and make sure every item is provided with adequate protection and every box is well padded, tightly sealed, and properly labeled, etc. What to pack when moving?
• Do some research together and choose the right moving company. And of course, don’t forget to ask for a free moving quote online.
• Make your brother or sister a care package – It is a great way to show them you care and help them feel more comfortable in their new environment. Include some of their favorite snacks, pictures of your family and friends, and a handwritten letter;
• Provide emotional support – Your sibling may need some encouragement and motivation during this transition. Try to make them laugh, remind them of their strength and the new opportunities that await them, and let them know that you believe in them and that you’re proud of them.

Related: How to move to college – moving tips for college students

Staying Connected: Coping Strategies After Your Sibling Moves to College

Once your brother or sister has moved away to college, the reality of their absence will sink in. Fortunately, there are many things you can do to combat loneliness and chase sadness away:

Stay in touch

Just because your sibling is going to college doesn’t mean that they’re gone forever. You can easily stay in touch by sending regular texts, emails, or video calls.

This will help you maintain your connection with them and keep you updated on their life. Your sibling will also appreciate your effort to stay in touch and will feel less homesick.

Plan a visit

Another way to cope with your sibling going to college is to plan a visit to see them. This will give you something to look forward to and will help you stay connected with your sibling.

You can plan a weekend trip or a family vacation to visit them at college – this way, you will not only get to spend some time with your brother and sister but will also have a chance to explore the college town and see what your sibling’s new life is like.

Move on with your life

Instead of feeling upset about your sibling going to college, use it as an inspiration to work toward your dreams.

Focus on your own goals and aspirations. Take the opportunity to explore new hobbies or activities that interest you. Join a club, start a new hobby, or take on a new project.

This will not only distract you from your sibling’s absence but also help you achieve something great.

Bonus tip: How to help kids cope with older siblings moving to college

When an older sibling moves to college, it can be a significant change for younger siblings. As a parent, it’s important to help your kids cope with their sibling moving to college and maintain a strong family bond:

Be honest

If you have younger kids struggling with their older siblings moving to college, it’s important, to be honest with them. Let them know that it’s okay to feel sad or anxious about their sibling leaving. Reassure them that their sibling still loves them and that they will still see them, but things will be different.

Being honest with your kids will help them understand the situation and cope with their feelings.

Talk about college in a positive way

Talking about college in a positive way can help your kids feel more excited and less anxious about their sibling’s move.

Share stories about your own college experiences or stories of people who have had positive college experiences. Highlight the exciting opportunities and experiences that college can offer.

Create new traditions

Creating new traditions can help your kids cope with their older siblings moving to college. This can be something as simple as having a family game night every week or going out for ice cream on the weekends.

Creating new traditions will give your kids something to look forward to and help them feel connected to their family.

Keep your kids involved

Keep your kids involved in their older sibling’s life by sharing updates about their college experience. Share photos, stories, and achievements with your kids.

You can also encourage your kids to write letters or draw pictures for their older siblings to send in care packages. This will not only keep your kids involved but also help their older siblings feel loved and supported.

Encourage communication

Encourage your kids to communicate with their older siblings by setting up regular video calls or phone calls. This will give your kids a chance to catch up with their older siblings and share their own experiences.

Encouraging communication will also help your kids feel connected to their older siblings and ease any anxiety or sadness they may be feeling.

Dealing with a sibling moving to college can be extremely challenging. It’s important to acknowledge your emotions and find ways to cope with the change. Staying in touch, planning fun activities, and taking up new hobbies can help you overcome your sadness and anxiety and restore your inner peace.

Remember – your sibling’s new adventure doesn’t mean the end of your relationship, it’s just the start of a new chapter.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)